In America, there are three main schools you go to: Elementary, Middle, and High. You start with kindergarten and work your way up to the twelfth grade. During kindergarten you learn the most important lesson the teacher will ever teach you: how to properly finger paint. The teacher allows you to use basic colors as well as purple – not a basic color. During the first grade, the teacher decides to commit suicide, so you’re class has art class everyday, only the boys around you are drawing tanks and missiles while the girls are drawing flowers and a triangle merged with a square in which they have an arrow that points to it that deciphers the word home. The second grade and third grade are literally the same thing because neither one actually teaches you something. The fourth grade is a turning point of a child’s life because the teacher finally says the words, “You’re finally growing up.” These are the words of death to a child because they will no longer enjoy being children because their teacher just ended their childhood, or if the teacher’s words didn’t affect them, they could just as well be characters from J.D. Salinger’s books. The fifth grade is alas the grade that can turn the children of the class either brave men and women or fruits. My friend told me his first trauma of having the first gay thought occurred in the fifth grade. Coincidence? The sixth grade is the next stage of this education system. Literally, it means that if you’re born into a farmer family, this is as high up as you may ever go in the American education system, otherwise, you may as well be homeless. For regular student who go to school, and regular does not mean Native America, the sixth grade just tempts students to try drugs. The eighties and nineties generations have pushed this anti-drug program to the school system that just begs the question and proves to students that the only way to chill out in class is to take a joint. Yeah, the program is “very” persuasive, isn’t it? Well, that just brings on the seventh grade – the pot grade. Class is no longer held to teach anymore, it’s more like a grievance period. The teachers will ask students how they feel and react to certain things, kind of like how pedophiles touch little children, but in a more philosophical sense. The eighth grade is arguably the most boring grade, ‘nuff said. For high school, read another article, that’s just way too complex. That’s where life turns to be centrally circles around the school life – who’s going out with who… what’s the next prank to pull… etc. In conclusion, America is in a state of buffoonery.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
The American Education System
Let’s face it America, our education system sucks balls. Why? Because we don’t weed out the bad teachers. Hasn’t Darwin taught us anything? It’s the survival of the fittest, not survival of the old man who yammers on and on about how he couldn’t find his dentures that morning. But seriously folks, there needs to be change. Why should Americans pay for an education system that’s not teaching our children? If you really follow the money trail, our tax dollars are going into the hands of the irresponsible – they pay for the aesthetics of the school or for top notch equipment that ultimately does not help the children learn because the teachers have not actually been trained to use the equipment. Seriously, America has to shape itself properly, not leave it to hands unregulated. There needs to be a reason to give schools more money, a good reason. I don’t know what kind of bull crap goes into the regulation of the money given to education. Don’t tell me that my child needs to go to a private school for a good education. Please, most of us can’t afford to pay for that. Plus, private school is just an institution that engulfs all of the rich kids because they don’t want any diversity; in other words, they don’t want their children going into the melting pot – they want their children to meet only the other rich people in the world. Now some people will claim that the system is great as it is – that it does not need to be fixed. To those people, I can’t show you statistics and boring figures and numbers, but I can show you how effective our media is. They’ve shown that the schools need more funding, but provide legit, liable proof that our schools actually need it. If our schools actually spent its time actually teaching without bias or political opinion, then the students will be well informed about current events enough that they can make their own decisions. Of course our government doesn’t want people to know anything – they want everyone to be in their cubicles working like good rats in the laboratory. Their policies and political stance makes no sense to the average American because most of us can’t even comprehend what is even being said. Our school system has a great way of dealing with this dilemma, don’t teach. At least don’t teach students to the point where they can critically think for themselves. For America’s politicians, whether Democrat or Republican, it really doesn’t matter, they want (impassively) for Americans to just agree with them for the elections. They don’t really want Americans to understand what is going on, they just want their agenda to be issued. Now, that doesn’t mean that politicians are necessarily bad people. Hell, there’s not really a good or bad person because some ideologists want this thing called a ‘grey area’ now. Politicians can be bribed. They can be funded by corporations that have their own agenda they want to issue. (Note: a corporation is actually a legal person or system under the law) Back to the education problem first: America can still fix it. First, weed out the bad teachers. This process may take years, but it will benefit many. Look, there’s a reason we gave old people tenure, but it is just an excuse to give teachers to slack off – you really think most teachers with tenure actually give a crap about the student’s well being? Take a look into their drawer and tell me there are no brochures with retirement packages in the Bahamas.
